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Whats it called?

Hello, its 9th August 2023. An overdue post but this blog is definitely too old for a cliche opening.  I recently lost a friend. Not lost from this world, just lost. Funny how I never saw this coming and even funnier that I was sso devastated. I get so fumingly angry thinking how silly it ended. Angry that I couldnt turn around time and avoided this from happening, sad that I couldnt even identify how a heartbroken person would look like! I was upset that I was continuosly thinking what I could have done differently and so bothered that it was never actually my fight to battle in the first place. I was googling the word I had in my head to explain what this was, but I couldnt find it; what is this called? What do you call when two parts collide resulting the middle part (or other parts) to eventually break? I really cant put my finger to where or how it started. Both parts were struggling, both parts were trying and both parts were...human.  Maybe I am wrongly angry for the wrong thing

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